Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 8:41 pm Post subject: Stamina
At 85 years of age, Morris married Lou Anne, a lovely 25-year-old. Since her new husband is so old, Lou Anne decides that, after their wedding, she and Morris should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may over-exert himself if they spend the entire night together.
After the wedding festivities Lou Anne prepares herself for bed and the expected knock on the door. Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Morris, her 85-year-old groom ready for action. They unite as one. All goes well, Morris takes leave of his young bride, and she prepares to go to sleep.
After a few minutes, Lou Anne hears another knock on her bedroom door and it's Morris. Again he is ready for more action. Somewhat surprised, Lou Anne consents for more coupling. When the newlyweds are done, Morris kisses his bride, bids her a fond goodnight and leaves.
She is set to go to sleep again, but, aha, you guessed it - Morris is back again, rapping on the door, and is as fresh as a 25-year-old, ready for more action.
Once again they enjoy each other but, as Morris gets set to leave again, his young bride says to him, "I am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover, Morris."
Morris, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Lou Anne and says, "You mean I was here already?"
yoshie1 V.I.P. Lifetime Xbox Version: Xbox V1.6 Modded: Xenium ICE White
Joined: Dec 26, 2004 Posts: 958 Location: Akron, Ohio
Posted: Fri Oct 28, 2005 4:34 pm Post subject:
Nice Shark....I can always expect a laugh from your posts. _________________ Xbox V1.6
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Shark2th Moderator
Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Fri Oct 28, 2005 4:38 pm Post subject:
Joke 1
A man and a woman were driving down the road and arguing about his deplorable infidelity when suddenly the woman reaches over and slices the man's penis off. Angrily, she tosses it out the car window.
Driving behind the couple is a man and his 9-year-old daughter. The little girl is just chatting away at her father when all of a sudden the penis smacks the car on the windshield, sticks for a moment, then flies off. Surprised, the daughter asks her father, "Daddy, what the heck was that?"
Not wanting to expose his little girl to anything sexual at such a young age, the father replies, "It was only a bug, honey."
The daughter sits with a confused look on her face, and after a few minutes she says, "Sure had a big d1ck, didn't it?"
Joke 2
A really drunk guy is walking home from the bar and sees a pumpkin patch on the side of the road. He thinks how nice and squishy they must be on the inside, and decides to have a little fun with a pumpkin. He finds a big one, cuts a hole in it, and starts going at it. It must have been getting pretty good because he didn't even notice that a cop car had pulled up, and that an officer was walking right towards him. The cop says "Hey buddy.... Do you know you're screwing a pumpkin?" to which the guy respond,s "A pumpkin?!? It's midnight already???" _________________ http://twitter.com/HQ_Shark2th
roo465 Moderator
Joined: Apr 29, 2005 Posts: 982 Location: ACT, Australia
Posted: Sat Oct 29, 2005 2:20 am Post subject:
haha, lol. yeah gotta watch those soft vegetables
Shark2th Moderator
Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Wed Jan 18, 2006 4:08 pm Post subject:
The old farmer had a large pond in the back, fixed up nicely; picnic
tables, barbecue pit, horseshoe courts, along with some apple and peach
trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it
was built.
One evening, the old guy decided to go down to the pond and look it
over. He hadn't been there for a while. He grabbed a five gallon bucket
to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping
in his pond. As he approached, he made the women aware of his presence.
At once, they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave."
The old man frowned, "I did not come down here to watch you young ladies swim naked, or to make you get out of the pond naked."
Holding up the bucket, he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."
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