Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Mon Aug 08, 2005 2:22 pm Post subject:
THE YEAR'S BEST [actual] HEADLINES OF 2004-5
Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
[imagine that!]
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
[no, really?]
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
[now that's taking things a bit far!]
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
[what a guy!]
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
[no-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!]
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
[see if that works any better than a fair trial!]
War Dims Hope for Peace
[I can see where it might have that effect!]
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
[you think?]
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
[who would have thought!]
Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police suspect Homicide
[they may be on to something!]
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
[you mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]
Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery charge
[he probably IS the battery charge!]
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
[weren't they fat enough?]
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
[Taste like chicken?]
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]
And the winner is....
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
******
Did I read that sign right?
In an office:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER......
PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK) _________________ http://twitter.com/HQ_Shark2th
Shark2th Moderator
Joined: Nov 17, 2004 Posts: 5222 Location: Tennessee, USA
Posted: Fri Sep 09, 2005 3:57 pm Post subject:
The average person only gets 7 right. This is based on U.S. info, so use
all lobes of your brain. This can be more difficult than it looks - it
just shows how little most of us really see!
There are 25 questions about things we see every day or have known about all our lives. How many can you get right? These little simple questions are harder than you think-- it just shows you how little we pay
attention to the commonplace things of life.
Put your thinking caps on. No cheating! No looking around! No getting
out of your chair! No using anything on or in your desk or computer!
Can you beat 20?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers as you go.
Check answers (on the bottom) AFTER completing all the questions.
REMEMBER - NO CHEATING!!! BE HONEST!!! That means no looking at your phone or anything on your desk...
Then, before you pass this on to your friends, change the number on the
subject line to show how many you got correct. Forward to your friends
and also back to the one who sent it to you.
LET'S JUST SEE HOW OBSERVANT YOU REALLY ARE. - If not, just have fun!
Here we go!
1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom?
2. How many states are there in the USA? (Don't laugh, some people don't
know)
3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch?
4. What six colours are on the classic Campbell's soup label?
5. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them?
6. When you walk does your left arm swing with your right or left leg?
(Don't you dare get up to see!)
7. How many matches are in a standard pack?
8. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white?
9. What is the lowest number on the FM dial?
10. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise?
11. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run?
12. How many channels on a VHF TV dial?
13. On which side of a women's blouse are the buttons?
14. Which way do fans rotate?
15. How many sides does a stop sign have?
16. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side?
17. How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel?
18. How many sides are there on a standard pencil?
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